Why is it so challenging to date in a big city like London?

Dating in London

A photo of Big Ben taken from Parliament Square — Central Quest Dating & Matchmaking Agency

We are often asked by people why is it so difficult to meet and date compatible people in a large city like London? After all, logic would indicate that dating ought to be easy in a city such as London, which has a large pool of multicultural singles. Unfortunately, that is not the case, and the team at Central Quest would like to share with you some of the reasons for that.

The Human Product – While the emergence of countless online dating sites offers singles an immediate communication channel to others whom are also seeking relationships, it also leads them to view other singles as mere products. The concept of online dating is fundamentally efficient as it allows two people to connect quite quickly if they both so choose. However, the way by which people are portrayed resembles the way by which a product is portrayed at an online retail store. Every person has a description, a shiny picture where they are smiling, and a list of distinguishable attributes that supposedly separate them from all the rest of the candidates on a particular dating site. How, then, is a person different than a product we see in an online retail store? Online products, much like people, have a description, an image that tells us what they look like and a list of unique functions. All those are meant to have us choose one product over another. Then, it is not a surprise that many people view each other as products. With this notion in mind, people approach dating with the belief that their peers are replaceable, just as their products are.

Concern over Financial Security – During recessionary times people tend to prioritize job security, whilst neglecting other aspects of their lives. It is no surprise that peoples’ fear of losing their income leads them to invest longer hours in their jobs. Whilst that in of itself is a logical thing to do, the side effect is that personal and romantic relationships often suffer as a result. In addition, recessionary periods often cause people to constantly look for other employment alternatives at a distance. In many cases men and women pursue better career opportunities at different parts of the world, often sacrificing their romantic relationships in the process.

Expectance rather than Acceptance – Many people have significantly high expectation levels from a potential partner and considerably low acceptance levels for much less than the character they’ve imagined. It seems so simple, yet it is somehow hard to “settle” for a person who does not meet our expectations. At the end of the day we should ask ourselves: should we be looking for the person who can satisfy our expectations or should we be accepting of the person who makes an effort in learning about the things we value?

One comment to Why is it so challenging to date in a big city like London?

  • Beth  says:

    This is so true! How do you suggest breaking that cycle?

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Central Quest Ltd. | 45 Charles St. | Mayfair | London W1J 5EH | United Kingdom | Telephone: +44 (0)20 7495 7744 | Company Registration Number: 8323212